The laws of living are very simple, in order to do something, you have never done before, you have to develop new skills or behaviors whilst at the same time building on your already existing habits. This is because new experiences are what lead to the manifestation of a new way of life and a new belief system.
You can never get better by remaining the same or by doing the same things that you have been doing in the past, you can only get better by taking the deliberate steps to make your flaws to transform into one of your biggest strengths.
Most great people have widely acknowledged that despite all their accomplishments and exceptional levels of talent, the thing that sky rocked them from one success to another success of a higher kind was when they made a decision to work on their weak areas.
An example of a successful person that did not accept his flaws but decided to work on them, was the renowned American rapper “RUSS.” RUSS always had a goal that one day he was going to be famous in the music industry and due to his conviction he decided to start making beats. He really believed without reasonable doubt that the avenue that would lead to actualizing his goal to become famous was music production. As the years went by his friend observed that RUSS had some raw talent to write music, particularly rap lyrics and as such he made the suggestion that in addition to making beats he can also try to write rap lyrics. Russ initially was doubtful because rapping was out of his comfort zone, however, he decided to take up the challenge and the rest is history. RUSS today is one of the most recognized rappers around the world with a very large online presence on social media sites, his music videos have been watched by billions, his music streamed by millions and also his book “It’s all in your head,” has been read and listened to by millions. The reason behind his success was simple, he decided to improve on something he considered a weakness and turned it into a strength.
Acceptance of your flaws is fatal, acknowledging them is important and working on them is an absolute necessity in your pursuit to self-discovery and personal growth. Your weakness if worked on could actually be the solution that leads to the manifestation of all of your life’s desires; therefore, take inventory of the areas in which you are struggling, then ask yourself questions as to why you are struggling in these particular areas and thereafter, decide to attack these weak areas until you gain absolute mastery and control over them.
Once you gain mastery over your weak areas, there is nothing that can really come in your way as pursue your own version success. Victory over your weaknesses, is the genesis of a life that just keeps growing from strength to strength, from opportunity to opportunity and from favor to favor.
A flaw is a feature that mars the perfection of something; a defect or a fault. Each and every one of us has flaws, and different ways of dealing with them. Some people are in denial about having flaws, while others ignore them. Others still, accept them, while a few decide to work on them.
Tyrion Lannister said, “Once you’ve accepted your flaws, no one can use them against you.”
Most people choose to go the route of accepting their flaws. They believe that once you learn to accept your flaws, you learn how to be happy with who you are now until you get to where you want to be. You don’t compare yourself to those ahead of you and feel insecure about yourself and your accomplishments.
At face value this is a good ideology to follow, is it not? But in reality, it is not the final step.
The four stages of character development
Denial
We have all been here in one way or another. The blind spots in our character that we do not know about. However, some people, even after their character flaws are pointed to the, still choose to remain in denial. When one is in denial about their flaws, they do nothing to work on them. They simply ignore that said faults in their character and personality exist. Which we all know, is detrimental to that person’s character development.
Acknowledgement
Acknowledging our flaws is the next step to working on them. You recognize that perhaps; you aren’t as perfect as you once perceived yourself to be. You begin to see that there are, indeed, areas that you could work on to be a better friend, brother, sister, daughter, son, cousin, partner, lover, spouse, etc. There are flaws in your character and you now see them for what they are.
Acceptance
Once one has recognized their flaws and see them for what they are, they need to accept them. However, most people are misguided and think that accepting their flaws means continuing to live their lives in that flawed state. There has been a rise, especially in recent years, of accepting your flaws, and just being who you are. But that takes away the option of improving and working on them and becoming a better person all around. When people accept their flaws, they tend to relax and begin to say things like, ‘this is just who I am’ and start to excuse their bad behavior as such. This takes the responsibility of change away from them, and they become complacent. This is where most people end their journey of character development.
Actual Work
We, however, do not believe it ends there. There is a final step, which is working on your flaws. This is not easy. It involves deliberate, consistent steps towards changing your negatives into positives. It involves a lot of work and facing your worst, and only enemy, yourself. Perhaps, this is why most people are not intentional about working on their flaws. It is, after all, easier to just accept them and call it a day.
To live out your purpose in this journey called life, it is important to wake up and stop denying that you have flaws. Acknowledge them for what they are, accept them, and finally work on them. You, and the world at large, will be a better place for doing so.
“I follow four dictates: face it, accept it, deal with it, and then let it go.” ~Sheng Yen
Extractions from a beautiful mind 